With a Name Like ACORN, It's Got to Be Good

The non-stop media coverage of ACORN is wearing me out. It's been going on all week; every major network is buzzing about ACORN. And I thought the Ted Kennedy coverage was excessive.
What's that? You haven't heard about ACORN? From just what planet do you hail? Admittedly, there would've been more coverage of these ginned up non-controversies if the media hadn't been so busy covering Van Jones' resignation. But when a White House Czar resigns late on a Saturday night (over a sleepy Labor Day weekend no less), you've got to expect it will be big news. As damn well it should.
Not because Jones is a self-avowed, loud and proud communist. Capitalism and democracy are so yesterday. And not because Jones joined the Truthers in calling for George Bush to be investigated for intentionally allowing the 911 attack. Jones eventually removed his name from the Truthers' petition, by the way. So take that, Birthers!
No, Van Jones's resignation was news because he devoted his life to greening the ghetto. He wanted to train minority youth to install solar panels, build windmill turbines, all kinds of great green stuff. He even founded S.T.O.R.M., exhorting minority youth to revolt against the establishment. But damn it all to hell, Obama stopped him in his tracks, threw him under the bus. Muttered something about inadequate vetting. RIP, Van Jones, RIP.

But let's get back to ACORN, though there's not much to say that the media hasn't said already. ACORN is a politically independent non-profit community organization that does really good things for the communities it serves.
Yet for months, ACORN has been mired in made-up controversies not of its own making. For instance, ACORN partnered with the U.S. Census Bureau, because ACORN is very good at counting hard-to-find people in liberal states. It was a perfect fit.
A perfect fit, that is, until a bunch of right-wing lug nuts claimed ACORN workers would try to influence the census by over-counting people. Hooey! To suggest that the workers who are counting people should be independent and non-political is stupid.
Everyone is political. And hello? Civics 101: politics is local. If ACORN wants to send out liberal democrats to count low-income minorities, why not?
And no more yammering about all the criminal prosecutions against ACORN workers who supposedly registered a bunch of non-existent people to vote, some even dead. Dead people can't vote, okay?
Oh, and that business about them registering the starting lineup for the Dallas Cowboys in Nevada was just a joke, folks. A harmless little joke.
ACORN's latest pimp-and-prostitute problem is just a tempest in a teapot. The only network that really reported on this fascist-fabricated pseudo-scandal is FOX. And doesn't that tell you something!

Just a few times, and I repeat, just a few, ACORN Housing workers counseled a pimp and prostitute on how to set up an illegal business, pay foreign, smuggled, under-age girls, commit bank fraud on their loan application to buy a house for their brothel, and cheat on their taxes to the IRS.
Stand down, already. Big whoop. Two white racist reporters with a right-wing agenda set up some hapless, rogue ACORN employees. Palin went rogue and nobody jumped on her, now did they! And have you seen that James O'Keefe on these videos? Who does he think he is? Joe Friday?
To those of you who say, "But Lawyer Mom, this happened in at least four different ACORN Housing offices! It's all on video!" I say to you, what's your point? Let's talk entrapment, shall we?
Besides, prostitution is the world's oldest profession. It's high time a fine organization like ACORN recognized that. All you Puritans can just get back on the Mayflower.

And no, I couldn't care less that ACORN has received $53 million of our tax-paid dollars since 1994 and is eligible for another 8 billion more. Please! Eight billion is a drop in the bucket. We won't even feel it.
The fact is, ACORN and its web of affiliates provide valuable services to low income people who would otherwise not get them, mmkay?

Labels: Acorn, Census Bureau, Hannah Giles, James OKeefe, Van Jones